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That Lucid Dream

 



Lucid dreaming is where a dreaming person is aware that they are dreaming, and may be able to influence the direction of the dream. (Cue Silent Lucidity by Queensryche)

In the course of my life, I have not had many lucid dreams. Most of them were very minor affairs when I sort of had the impression that I was dreaming right before I woke up. But one time –just once-- I had a spectacularly successful lucid dream. I was very young, maybe four or five years old. Intermittently, I had been having a nightmare where a skeleton man was chasing me. It was terrifying. I would be in some fantasy or other and then this skeleton would appear. The hideous toothy grin pointed at me. My heart would race. I would run and scream. Afraid to look back because the skeleton man might be gaining on me. Any moment I would feel his cold skeleton fingers touching the back of my throat. Then I would wake up, panting, with my heart racing. My dark room with shadow upon shadow concealing who knew what, did not help.

I don’t remember my mother or father coming into my room to comfort me. Perhaps they did, but all I remember is the terror. To be fair, the skeleton man never actually touched me, never actually hurt me. It was just the thought of it that scared me. Then one day, after I had had this nightmare probably several nights in a row, I realized that it was only because I didn’t know I was dreaming that it scared me. Dreams couldn't hurt me. If I knew I was dreaming, then I didn’t have to be scared. So, I devised a plan. In my conscious mind I knew that the skeleton man was a nightmare. It wasn’t real. It was only in the dream state that I thought it real. So, I decided I had to train myself that whenever I saw the skeleton man, to realize that I was dreaming. If I see him, I’m dreaming. And if I am dreaming, he is coming from my brain. If I see him, I’m dreaming. He can’t hurt me. If I see him, I am dreaming.

I don’t know if it was that night or a few nights later when I saw the skeleton man again. The old familiar fear came on me and I started to run away. Then I remembered. It was a dream. I was in a dream I turned and faced the skeleton man. I must have yelled something at him like “no” or “go away.” He went away. When I woke up, I was amazed that it had worked. I was ready if I ever saw the skeleton man again, but I never did. I had banished him for good. That four or five-year-old me was a worrier, and I had plenty of things I found to worry about, but that was one thing that I was free from.

There are books and courses and philosophies built around lucid dreaming. You can find lots of advice on how to take control of your dreams. While I obviously think that there are times when that is a good thing, I don’t think we should have complete control of our dreams. I think the random dips into our unconsciousness have value. We have evolved this way. There is probably a reason for it.

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